1. Does he/she have a beard and glasses?
Point distribution may be modified for female candidates, depending on facial hair preference.
a) Glasses [1 point]
b) Beard or Moustache [1 point]
c) Neither [0 points]
d) Goatee or Soul Patch [-1 points]
2. Does he/she like Tom Goes to the Mayor?
a) Yes [2 points]
b) Yes, after you showed it to him/her [1 point]
c) No [-16 points]
Total your potential match's points.
> 3 points: This is a special fellow/lass. Hang on to him/her.
2 - 3 points: Does he/she like any other good teevee shows? Could you maybe persuade him/her to stop shaving, or perhaps encourage him/her to develop myopia?
< 2 points: Eh, you might as well spend your time catching up on those Always Sunny episodes you missed while watching his/her death metal band rehearse.
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